Saturday, 4 September 2010

Broken: A Poem By Pete Marshall


Broken
A Poem By Pete Marshall

Homes that are silent apart from a tick
the creak of the pipes and the hum of a fridge 
the hub of a kitchen now cordoned with tape
a house that lays dormant alone and awake

A path that lies beaten , a broken front door
the smell of the damp and the chill of the floor
and breath that sits heavy upon a cold face
the coals in the shed and the ash in the grate

The rooms that are empty and a bed that is cold
the sheets that are soiled and the truths that are told
and skies that are angry from tempers that flare
the shouts in the house from the souls that lay bare

The stains on the walls are the strains of a fight
the sound of the heart that beats through the night
and the hub of a kitchen now cordoned with tape
a house that lays dormant alone and awake

**********

I wanted to say something about todays poem but it has been very hard trying to find the words, I hope the following will do? The image I found, a broken heart with mind written through it, is very significant as MIND is a UK charity for better mental health...their web site is www.mind.org.uk. This poem, Broken, explores both, a broken heart & a broken mind..the hub of the house, the kitchen, is the heart and the bedroom is the mind.....

image courtesy commons flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/bored-now/

18 comments:

Boonie S said...

Your poems have a distinct and beautiful rhythm. I really enjoy them. Thanks.

All the best, Boonie

kkoning78 said...

This gave me chills! Thank you for sharing.

RiikaInfinityy said...

wonderfully written!=D

Gerry Snape said...

Wonderful rhythm and the words roll around my mouth. this is so emotive as well. We have taken on three houses with just such memories in our life together and with love hoped to transform them.It takes a long time for sadness, hoplessness and fear to disappear from premises. You captured that exactly.

Brian Miller said...

a rather chilling write pete...you set the tone well...leaving us with images to ponder...

Pete Marshall said...

HI boonie....thanks very much for your comments.cheers pete

kkoning..a job well done..cheers pete

thanks riikalnfinity..actually took me all day to get this right..must have rewritten it about 30 times

Pete Marshall said...

hi gerry..thank you for your wonderful comments and support..cheers pete

thanks bri..appreciate that..cheers pete

Claudia said...

pete - this is fantastic
while reading it, i had to think of the former house of my grandparents (i was often there as a child) and when they died and i entered that house some years later (it was an old farmhouse and they left it just as it were with all the furniture), it felt just like reading your poem with all the wonderful words you found to describe it.
and after reading your explanation - i think people can feel exactly in the same way
WOW!! hat off!

annell said...

Though it was not what you were writing about, what came to mind for me, and for the first time. That the house might miss the occupants it held, when they are gone. So it is not only us who might miss a house who has given us shelter, but we might be missed as well.

dustus said...

Vivid write and excellent use of metaphor, Pete. Wonderful combination of rhythm and detail. Also dig the porous details in the picture. cheers

Pete Marshall said...

wow thanks claudia..thats a great comment..as i was writing this i had so many different ideas buzzing in my head about comparing your body to a house...but it took me a long time to write and rewrite this and i must admit there is one line that i am still not happy with but when you get a comment like yours it does make you feel kinda smug..cheers pete

Pete Marshall said...

hi annell...thats the beauty of poetry and each individuals own interpretation...and yours sits just as well with it..its good because it also open my eyes to a piece and i can read it differently too..cheers pete

Pete Marshall said...

thanks adam...as always i doff my cap to praise from you..cheers pete

Neva Flores said...

Pete, I am touched deeply by your poem......

Pete Marshall said...

hi neva..thanks for popping by..cheers pete

moondustwriter said...

sorry - I'm late. I read this yesterday and had to wait to respond.

It speaks of mental illness but I also picked up on domestic abuse both are quite heart breaking

Moon hugs Pete

Pete Marshall said...

hi ya moonie..yes you were right to pick up on that as i wanted to make it feel like there had been a fight and even a death but the reality of the death was the breakdown of the soul and spirit..cheers pete

she said...

Your hardwork paid off in my opinion, Pete. This was a chilling tale of horror in and out of the body and mind. The poem's topic became clear for me at the line "sheets that are soiled." That is just never a good thing. Lovely write.